Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I have fence marks all over my body
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
