I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
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