i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
