Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Randomize
