Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
two words...techno handjob
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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