There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
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