We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
