Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize