Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
My penis needs a shock collar
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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