I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
