you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Randomize
