I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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