So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
