apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
