This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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