they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
What happened to fro yo and sex?
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
