im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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