i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
