ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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