We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize