I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Randomize
