If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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