Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Found your dick twin last night
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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