i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
