i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
P.S. I can't hear my feet
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
