I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize