yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize