so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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