Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
