were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
