It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
