I don't think brook has ever known best
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
