everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
