Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
