I'm drive I can fine osifer
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
