Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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