You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Randomize
