She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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