i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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