i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I believe in your delicious
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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