Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Houston, we have a squirter
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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