After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
you traded sex for a burrito?
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
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