Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
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