Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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