how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Randomize
