when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I just had sex on a roof
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
