we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
My bed smells like the plague
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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