I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Randomize
