God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
