i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
