P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Randomize
